She wants to call him Daddy. She wants to be his baby girl.
I admit it, when this was first brought up, when they first admitted to each other that she tugged at his Daddy strings and he tugged at her baby girl strings and they brought it to me for the must have talks, it had me stealing glances at the freak out tree. But I stayed calm, told Daddy that we would talk about it when things escalated to that point. I mean… they hadn’t even had sex or scened together yet. I wasn’t all that worried. It seemed we had some time before it would become a real thing we had to deal with.
Not quite as much time as I had hoped for. The question was posed by each of them separately to me. Can I be her Daddy? Can I be his baby girl? I know that my feelings on the dynamic are a huge concern for both of them. I know they are both watching me very closely, gauging my reaction, waiting for me to go scrambling up the freak out tree. I have to admit, I was tempted. I’ve been dancing around the freak out tree since the question was asked. I didn’t go up, but I almost did.
The Daddy/princess thing is our thing. No one else has ever pulled at his Daddy strings. But honestly, she is so much like me that it doesn’t come as a surprise at all that she would, but still. Only one other person has ever even had permission to call him Daddy and she only had it during sex. They didn’t have a D/bg dynamic. It was just a name she called him when they fucked. This is different.
So, yep… part of me wants to freak out… dig my heels into the rabbit trail and just stop things right where they are. I could do that. They both love me enough to stop there with me and stay as long as I need them too. I don’t doubt this at all. They would still feel the tug and pull. It is natural between them. It is nothing short of compulsion. They are compelled, they can fight it all they want, I can kick and scream about it all I want and it is still going to be there. There is nothing they can do to make it go away. There is nothing I can say that will make the tug and pull any less.
I know that feeling. I am in the unique position to be able to say yes, to allow them to experience something that is so organic and so natural and so desired by them both or to say no, to watch them fight the compulsion, to fight the desire, to deny each other an amazing experience in their lives just because I can’t find a way to get ok with it.
After pacing around the freak out tree all night last night, I have walked away from it this morning. I know that I am going to let them explore this dynamic. I have figured out what I need to be able to find joy in this new area of our lives. It helps that I absolutely adore her. I adore her husband. I adore her girlfriend. And, I adore my Daddy.
I’m sure, just like everything else, that we are going to talk this new dynamic damn near to death as we figure out what is ok and what is not and where all the pieces fit. We’ll establish rules and boundaries and all of the important people will be considered. They will decide what Daddy and baby girl means to them and just how deeply they want to explore the possibilities. We’ll move at the pace of the slowest person, and I might actually be that person this time around. I’m ok with this. I am curious to see where it all goes and looking forward to the ride.
He will be her Daddy. She will be his baby girl. It will be good.